THE DEATH OF THE BABY PACIFIER – WHY WOULD YOU EVEN USE ONE?

The decision to use a baby pacifier or not, is it really up to you? Are you just following a trend, or do you actually find it useful? Be honest with your answer.  There is no judgement here.

Since this blog is about conscious living, I decided to investigate a little on this tendency that we have as parents to want to plug our babies from the get-go.

I’m all for the power of the freedom of expression. Hence, the idea of using a plug/pacifier/dummy on a child has always made me cringe.  It’s my belief that the pacifier prevents them from expressing themselves.  From a young age we are teaching them that their voice does not matter.  Sounds far fetched? Well, not really.  Look around you and see how parents are using the pacifier on their kids.  Observe and pay attention.

Don’t get me wrong, I too used a pacifier on my kids, but I can tell you exactly why, when, how and how long I used one. I’m actually ashamed to admit that I used one and I cried the first time I plugged my baby. Yet, I’m proud that my use of a pacifier was temporary and a means to an end during a short time span (2 months) in my children’s lives. The pacifier did not control our lives because I did not let it, and neither should you.

The origins of the pacifier

A pacifier is a rubber or silicone nipple substitute for an infant to suck upon. Sounds tasty, right? Have you sucked on one lately? It’s actually quite disappointing.  It tastes like rubber, it’s not particularly pleasant nor soothing, according to French journalist David Castello-Lopes.  Yet, we have no problem giving it to our child.

Pacifiers are first mentioned in medieval literature circa 1473.  It wasn’t until the beginning of the early 20^th century however, that its modern form was introduced in our households to stop the baby from crying.

A pacifier is a gag that prevents a child from expressing himself or herself that is systematically prescribed in our society.

Babies have always loved chewing/sucking on things, it’s in their DNA. If you don’t give them anything, they’ll chew on themselves like their thumb, fingers, feet.

Before the modern-day pacifier came along, babies were given something to chew on. It was often in the form of a cloth soaked in honey or sugar, or coral, boxwood, ivory or bone and referred to as a teat. 

These methods all had the same objective: to keep the baby quiet or help the baby when teething.

Then, in 1901, a pharmacist in the United States came up with the idea of forming a small rubber pouch that would look like a synthetic nipple that a baby could suck on.  That’s how the pacifier we use today was born.

Nowadays, 80% of children in developed countries use a pacifier.

It was not unanimously approved.  In 1908, a famous New York pediatrician hypothesized that babies who used a pacifier too often became systematic masturbators. (source: David Castello-Lopes)  Interesting theory.  Oddly enough, one of my youngest son’s caregivers had come up with a similar theory.

How to use a baby pacifier effectively

When used properly, a pacifier can be of great help.

Unless your child is a preemie, it is recommended that the pacifier not be introduced to a baby before they are 1 month old.  However, when I was in the maternity ward with my second child in France, ALL the babies already had a pacifier in their mouths, except mine.

The need for suction goes back to the life in utero while sucking its thumb in the womb. 

As a recommendation, use of a pacifier for premature babies to teach them to suckle and feed themselves. The act of sucking secretes endorphins, the pleasure hormone.  It comforts them more effectively and promotes their proper development.

Do not confuse offering a pacifier to meet a sucking need with putting it on to silence it.  It is necessary to decipher his cries before anything else.

Some babies can’t tell the difference between sucking and hunger.  If he cries and you give him the pacifier right away, he’ll settle for it.  This goes against the principle of feeding on demand.  The result: breastfeeding is a failure; you experience milk supply problems if baby sucks on the pacifier instead of the breast. (Santé Magazine)

Recommendations

• Breastfed children should not be given an artificial teat or pacifier until a feeding routine has been established according to WHO and Unicef.

• Only offer the pacifier after or between feedings. Ideally, a pacifier should only be used for falling asleep and not walking around during the day.

• The pacifier should be removed from the baby’s mouth and bed as soon as the baby falls asleep.

• If your baby doesn’t want it, don’t force it.

• DO NOT USE as a mean to put an end to the crying.  The cries are the only means for a baby to communicate and it is our responsibility to decipher them first and foremost.

• Remove the pacifier around 6 months, as it is easier that way.  At 6 months, a baby can be soothed to sleep using various cues: a comforter, a nightlight, or with stories or songs that you read/sing to him.  SIDS significantly decreases after 6 months.  Babies don’t remember things exist at this point:  “Out of sight out of mind”. 

For ideas on how to get a baby to sleep without a pacifier, READ HERE.

• DO NOT BUY the pacifier holder/string.  YOU CONTROL the usage of the pacifier, not the other way around it.  As a matter of fact, it is generally forbidden to use in daycares for security reasons.

Pros and cons of using a baby pacifier

There are, of course, pros and cons in using a pacifier. Whether you decide to use one or not should really be up to you and responding to a possible need that your child might have. 

Your choice, however, shouldn’t be dictated by the society in which you live in. It shouldn’t be influenced by mummy trends nor by silly commercials and pretty pictures on Instagram. Actually, the picture part is another one of the things that irritates me about pacifiers, but I digress.

One of the reasons parents use a pacifier is to avoid SIDS. The risk of SIDS considerably diminishes after the age of 6 months, which is one reason why pediatricians recommend removing the pacifier from your routine at that age. To reduce the risk of SIDS, here is a list of things you can do:

• Have the baby sleep on the back;
• Only put it on its stomach for games;
• Do use no blankets. Pillows, stuffed animals or cuddly toys that could get on the face in the crib;
• Use a firm mattress;
• Have the baby sleep in pajamas or in a “baby” sleeping bag;
• 19 degrees Celsius is the ideal room temperature; and
• Live in a smoke free environment.

If none of the above recommendations have allowed you to make a more constructive decision on whether or not to use a pacifier, here is a list of pros and cons to guide you in your thought process.

CONS

•  Once you give in, then you’ll have to break the habit.  Sounds like a drug habit.  Wait.  Weren’t we talking about babies?

•  Prolonged exposure to a pacifier can create dental problems such as misalignment of child’s teeth. It can also deform the palate, especially if used beyond the age of 2.

•  It can potentially disrupt breast-feeding as the baby might have a nipple confusion.  That is why its recommended to wait to introduce the pacifier until you have settled into a nursing routine.

•  Sleep dependence and sleep disorder can become an issue.  How many times have your heard mothers complain about their baby waking up multiple times during the night because he kept losing his pacifier? Many times, the babu will become dependent on it to fall asleep.

Having to replacing the pacifier in the middle of the night is one of the biggest disadvantages

THE PACIFIER IS JUST AN ARTIFICIAL BREAST SUBSTITUTE

• A newborn happily sucking away on a pacifier may not be getting enough time at the breast or on the bottle.  Not getting enough breast milk / milk / skin to skin time.

PROS

• It can help soothe and calm a baby after a long day of visits. 

This is what I did with my youngest.  I only gave it to him from 1 to 3 months old at the end of the day when he would be most irritable. My son didn’t have an interest in falling asleep with a pacifier. This is probably due to the fact that we already had a sleep routine well established.

•  The pacifier can help distract the baby from its need to feed while you get his bottle ready or yourself ready.

•  Using a pacifier can help a baby fall asleep.

I used the pacifier with my oldest from 2 to 4 months.  I cried the first time I forceable used it on him because I was out of ideas on how to soothe him and I was all alone and exhausted.  Not my proudest moment.  However, it ended up helping me in soothing him while I got his bottle ready late in the day and to help him fall asleep.  As soon as I was able to get a sleep routine and that he was finally sleeping through the night at 4 months old, I stopped using the pacifier.

THE PACIFIER IS EASIER TO GIVE UP THAN THE THUMB

• A pacifier can ease discomfort during flights.  It will relieve ear pain caused by air pressure changes but you could just easily use your breast or a baby bottle for that as well.

•  Premature babies use a pacifier to learn to suckle and feed themselves.

•  A pacifier can be used as a relief from constant breastfeeding.

Now if you do decide to use a pacifier, make it an eco-friendly one by Totote, made in France.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by TOTOTE (@tototeofficial)

Pacified conclusion

While a pacifier is effective to soothe a baby in the first few months, it shouldn’t be used in all situations.

Using a pacifier is the easy solution when you don’t want to bother actually listening to your child’s needs. As a result, we create a dependence for our child on an inanimate object. A pacifier should always be used as a last resort and sporadically.

Before giving in to the temptation of plugging your baby, you must exhaust all ideas to console him. A baby cries because:

• of hunger or thirst;
• it is soiled;
• is uncomfortable (gaz); or
• it needs human touch or be rocked.

So listen first, what they have to say is important.

Nowadays, the use of a pacifier has become an easy solution for parents.  Some might say that they’d rather see their child use their thumb to soothe themselves than a foreign object.  I am one of those parents.  Contrary to what we might think, thumb sucking until the age of four won’t damage the teeth or jawline but need to forego it once the permanent teeth erupt.

Finally, I strongly dislike seeing children or baby pictures with a pacifier in their mouth.  Imagine if we constantly took pictures of ourselves like that as adults.  What message would it send? And how ridiculous would we look like!  So for the love “God”, remove the pacifier and then take the picture.  Isn’t it much nicer to remember your child without a foreign object constantly obstructing its face?  He’ll surely think so when he is an adult and wants to look at his baby pictures.